Weariness When The Tank Is Empty
“Now may the God of peace who brought up our Lord Jesus from the dead, that great Shepherd of the sheep, through the blood of the everlasting covenant, make you complete in every good work to do His will, working in you what is well pleasing in His sight, through Jesus Christ, to whom be glory forever and ever. Amen.” Hebrews 13:20, 21 (NKJV)
Personally speaking -
It never seemed to be this way in times passed - lack of enthusiasm, a sense of coldness and indifference toward what still has to be done in life. It’s like being in a high wire act without a safety net, and you know you’re just not up to it anymore. But somehow the circus must go on because everyone else thinks it should - family, church, social involvements, peers… Yes, it’s a grab for all the gusto kind of world.
Past projects and things that you once thought just had to happen no longer interest you, or provide very little motivation or interest, but everyone else still thinks you ought to “just do it” anyway.
A dutiful part of you says, you must keep trying. The sensible authentic half says, to blazes with it. No longer useful to the current processes.
This acid test comes in the later years, especially along the home stretch, when you’ve exceeded the supposedly biblical three score and ten. I never thought I’d feel like this, but I do. I didn’t feel like this even two or three years ago - when it seemed like life was worth living. Before the powers that be started messing with our heads and manipulating and threatening our lives! And everything else also seemed to go tail over teacups in life.
There are more dead end days like that now than there were before, when it was a once-in-awhile feeling, and a nap might take care of it. But no longer. And then you wake up to some sunshine, where you may feel refreshed and inspired to try again. Now waking seems like having been cold cocked and knocked unconscious, and finding yourself on the floor after a fight… What was that? When you didn’t know you were in a fight!
The tank of inner resilience and reserve fuel is empty. Yet it seems there are miles ahead on the mission. That’s not a good place to be. But many are there, in this present weariness, older or even much younger than I.
The world around you is not what it was, and you’d pretty much like to tell the idiots running that world what they can do with their so called Great Reset and New World Order. Do what you want, and suck as many unsuspecting people into your agenda as you can. Just leave me the heck alone, and go away. Give peace a chance. Remember that old song?
What guilt trips you is that you don’t even want to “make others aware” anymore. Because no one really gives a hoot. You’re finished with feeling like the voice of one crying in the wilderness. Was that ever even a thing to do? Was that my commission, or did I invent that?
Maybe, maybe not.
If God wants me to keep pushing, then He’s going to have to supply the wherewithal to keep on keeping on!
This morning I was grappling with this angst in prayer. I’ll be honest - I sometimes wonder if Anyone is actually listening or cares. Yes, great doubt goes with great spiritual dryness too. There’s a challenge on every side it seems. And your pony seems to have left the race some time ago.
The above passage was the next one on my list of cross-references dealing with the subject of God as the One Who works in us to will and to do His good pleasure (Philippians 2:13) I have lists, and that’s how I usually muse over, pray about, and study what the Scripture says on a given theme every day. One finds out a lot that way. A lot that the cherry picking religionists don’t want you to see. Others may work it differently, but this is what’s worked for decades for me. And I don’t intend to change my “morning modality.”
Hebrews 13:20,21 was just the needed tidbit of manna for the day, in my current mental, emotional, and spiritual state. This is when the “aerial combat” seems more intense than ever, and you look at the fuel gage, and you notice… “Oh, oh!” I don’t have what it takes to complete the mission! It’s just not here.
The original recipients of this Epistle were probably a lot more challenged and in need of exhortation and encouragement than most of us. Yet it is quite relevant to any epoch, time, or challenging phase of life.
The benediction expressed in this passage seems to put the Wind back beneath one’s wings, at least enough to realize that the oomph doesn’t come from self reliance in the first place. Lift off is not possible with no Wind!
You send up a distress call. There’s no pretense. There cannot be, since you realize you’re dead in the water with a typhoon on the way, and there’s nothing in you or about you that can stay the course. And then, the right encouragement comes along at just the right time. Just enough.
So often we have not because we ask not.
Then it’s as if the Apostle and writer of this Letter to the Hebrews reaches out across the many centuries and gives the blessing, “Now may the God of peace who brought up our Lord Jesus from the dead, that great Shepherd of the sheep, through the blood of the everlasting covenant, make you complete in every good work to do His will, working in you what is well pleasing in His sight, through Jesus Christ, to whom be glory forever and ever. Amen.”
What is pleasing in His sight. Not the sight of the guilt trippers who have not been in one’s shoes. Just wait.
There’s living power in the Word! The God of peace brings what it takes to the scene to make us complete in every good work, to do His will, as He works in us - through Jesus Christ - what is well pleasing in His sight.
We’re receptacles of Grace and Power, as empty “faith” tanks which need to be filled.
Sometimes that may also mean embracing a time when it’s best to stay away from the fray! At least for awhile. There is a time and purpose for everything under Heaven, right? There are days when the will to do and the power to do are there. One can know that too and be “in the zone”.
But then there may be time when one hears the sound of retreat. That is not always a bad thing. The Commander knows when you’ve had enough and you may even be a detriment to the mission… Or it’s because He loves you enough to let you heal!
There’s a time to hold ‘em and a time to fold ‘em. Wisdom is knowing what time it is.
Let the one who needs Wisdom ask, and it will be given.
Life is not just one event of accomplishment after another, inspired by the popular motivational gurus. The power to let go and let it be may at some point be just as valid as doing, in spite of all the “activist” voices out there guilt tripping you with their accusations that “all of this is ‘our’ fault, that ‘we’ let things get to this point… so ‘we’ have to do something about it!”
Somehow I’m done hearing any voice “out there” except the One to Whom all authority has been given in Heaven and on Earth, the Holy Spirit living within me. The Truth is “in here,” in spite of the X Files.
Perhaps if “we” had paid attention to Him in the first place, and heeded His directives, it's a strong possibility we wouldn’t be in this current insanity.
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